Friday, August 20, 2004

7 / 20 August 2004

The one who is perfect in love and has reached the summit of detachment knows no distinction between one's own and another's, between faithful and unfaithful, between slave and freeman, or indeed between male and female. But having risen above the tyranny of the passions and looking to the one nature of men he regards all equally and is equally disposed toward all. For in him there is neither Greek no Jew, neither male nor female, neither slave nor freeman, but Christ is everything and in everything. .............
St Maximus the Confessor

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

5 / 18 August 2004

Marbles in My Pocket

I was asked by an acquaintance what Adult ADD was like. This was my response.

I've been ADD all my life. But I didn't "know" it until I was in my 50's! I thought it was some kind of character defect, and I struggled against it for decades.

But I'm now kind of resigned to it - or, more likely, accustomed to it. I admit function best in a *slightly* cluttered environment. If something isn't "in my face" I forget it's around or needs to be done. That's why I have to keep a calendar on the computer and have it pop-up the minute I turn on my computer every morning. that way I know exactly what I need to do. If I put away my current projects, I may not get back to them until they are past due because I won't think of them. So my desk will always be messy.

I'm the original "pack rat" - I see "something shiny" in the living room, pick it up and trek toward the kitchen to put it away. On the way, I notice "something shiny" in the dining area, put down the first object and pick up the second object and trek toward the bedroom to put it away. I stop by my office to check e-mail, and put the object down. After checking e-mail and playing a couple of computer games, I get up and go out to the kitchen to make lunch. There I see "something shiny," pick it up and take it with me toward the workshop. On the way, I walk through the family room, and notice one of the GKs left a game out. I put down the current object, start putting away the game, notice the rug needs to be vacuumed, get out the vacuum, notice the floor in the hall needs sweeping, put down the vacuum and go to get the broom. On the way to the broom I notice the game in the family room and get it picked up - but it doesn't fit on the shelf, so I "jam" it in one way or another, and head to the laundry room - I don't know why, I just go there. I turn around a few times wondering why I went there, and start back through the family room. Notice the vacuum is out, and hook it up, turn it on and start vacuuming. Notice that there are a few marbles and a chess piece on the floor, and turn off the vacuum to pick them up. Can't find the box and board for the chess set, so I drop the chess piece in "a" drawer (I'll probably never find it again when it's needed - only when I happen to open the drawer and notice it). Put the marbles in my pocket. It is now noon, we usually eat lunch at 11:15 or 11:30, and the poor ol' curmudgeon plaintively asks me about it. I fix lunch and we eat about 12:30 - not bad, only an hour late - and look around. The living room is not straightened, the family room is a mess, the kitchen is a mess, my office has something in it that belongs in the bedroom, and I've accomplished nada beyond vacuuming a 20 square inch area of the family room and preparing lunch. I have marbles in my pocket and I don't know why! This is my ADD. Someone else may have a different experience.

My dear ol' curmudgeon is very good about reminding me to do things. He gave up ever expecting a "neat-nik" kind of house. The kids think I'm a "space biscuit" (light and flakey). Long ago they told me, "Mom, we'll never know if you develop Alzheimers - you've been spacey all your life!" This is true! I have very little short-term memory and have *never,* not even as a child, been able to remember names (nouns) or descriptors (adjectives, adverbs). Found out, after several botched "memory courses" that this is probably genetic and has to do with whenter you have access to a particular area of your brain - apparently mine has been in hiding all my life!

I am an "organizational hobbiest." As my dear ol' curmudgeon will say, "It's another vain attempt at organization by the Space Biscuit!" The DKs just giggle and nod. They all know. And it *is* amusing. Thank goodness both the ol' curmudgeon, the DKs and the DGKs all have a sense of humor about it! They don't get mad (usually). Just a little exasperated and impatient from time to time, but they quickly get over it, and whatever set them off becomes the latest in a string of "my flake, the Mom" (or "my flake, the Wife") stories to use to regale friends and relatives.

So we ADD'rs have to make decisions and try to stick to them! We stumble and get side-tracked, but over time, we try to get to where we can handle things better and better. I don't ever expect to be perfect! It doesn't happen to anyone! But I can be a success at nearly anything I put my mind and determination to. I've managed to (in order):

get a BSN (nursing)
have 2 kids
get a masters
have a third kid
move three times
go through a divorce
go through bankruptcy
marry again
*Convert to Eastern Orthodoxy* - best decision I **ever** made!
move several more times
teach in a university
marry off 2 kids
get a PhD
assistant direct choir
marry off the third kid
manage a complex computer-based Operating Room support system
start and run my own business
Enjoy the 10 grandchildren
enjoy my husband

I still struggle, at well past 60, to deal with my ADD, but I can look back and see that I compensated for it, and I know I will be able to continue compensating for it. It will always be with me, like someone with diabetes will always have that with them, but just as diabetes can be managed, so ADD can be managed. I just have to work a little harder at it than some other people do. But I'm really blessed by God. I have a husband who adores me - and I adore him right back - I have 3 wonderful children and 10 marvelous grandkids (my reward for not strangling the 3 kids when they were teens!). I'm respected in my career.

Well, That's what Adult ADD is for me. I have marbles in my pocket and I don't know why!

Saturday, August 14, 2004

Saturday 2 / 14 August 2004

Procession of the Precious Wood of the Life-giving Cross of the Lord. The Holy Seven Maccabees, their Mother Solomonia and Eleazar the Priest. The Nine Holy Martyrs: Leontius, Attus, Alexander, Cindeus, Mnesitheus, Cyriacus, Menaeus, Catunus and Eucieus.

Today is a "bleah" day. We have so many bills from the Ol' Curmudgeon's heart attack. Today was the day we sat down and worked on them. Bleah!

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The Orthodox Publishing Society has many resources for Palm OS's, including various prayers and services, Saint Commemorations and Fasting Typikon (in date book format), and the NT KJB in Ebok format (needs Palm Reader). They also have a Slavonic Tutor, Slavonic fonts, and some audio files. This is a marvelous website, and I highly recommend it!

Thursday, August 12, 2004

Thursday, August 12 / July 30 (Church Calendar)
Apostles Silas and Silvanus of the Seventy and those with them: Crescens, Epenetus, and Andronicus

Glory to God for All Things!

I was searching diligently on the web for the Akathist of St. George, when I ran across a reference to a Serbian Orthodox Church. I "went there" and have started a most rewarding e-corresondence with the priest. Fr. Rodney Torbic of St. George Serbian Orthodox Church in Carmichaels PA pointed me to a book I already had (duh!) (The Book of Akathists available from St. John of Kronstadt Press) is a wonderful resource, and I got it out immediately!

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OpinionJournal - Outside the Box

I'm finding, more and more, that Opinion Journal is a lovely place to find well-reasoned examination of issues - the logic that is generally missing during the "Silly Season" when politicoes are appealing to the emotions of the electorate. There are so many lies out there - by both sides - that it's nice to find a place that holds both sides accountable for what they say! Opinion Journal is free (as opposed to the web version of the WSJ, which is exhorbitant).

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Fr. Rodney Torbic suggested I should do some writing on healthcare ethics. Will have to think about it some, but it might be something I could do. Certainly, I see all of the seamy sides of healthcare being in the medical-legal end of things!

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Wednesday 4 August 2004

Today I was surfing around and found this little jewel. Really like this concept.

Welcome to

Since we're getting between 2 and 5 "trash" faxes daily, I'm going to sign up for it. Will let you know if it works.

Monday, August 02, 2004

Legal Nurse; This and That

Commemoration of the Holy Fathers of the First Six Ecumenical Councils; St. Macrina, sister of St. Basil the Great; St. Dius, abbot of Antioch; Opening of thr Relics of St. Seraphim of Sarov; Blessed Romanus, prince of Ryazan; Blessed Stephen, king of Serbia and his mother St. Militsa; St. Paisius of the Kiev Caves; NewMartyr Victor, bishop of Glazov (1934).
[Greek Calendar: Abba Diocles of The Paradise]
Repose of Blessed Abbot Nilus (1870); Elder John of St. Nilus of Sora Monastery
(1903), and Hieroschemamonk Anthony of Valaam (1862).

Holy Saints pray to the Lord for us!

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The ol' curmudgeon spent the entire day yesterday re-doing my laptop - I finally "gave in" and asked him to put XP on it. Now I have to spend most of today re-doing all my settings, downloading all the little utilities I love so much, etc. The ol' curmudgeon wants me to run all those utils past him - says I won't need most of them on XP. That's nice. XP is taking up so much of my hard drive space I'm gonna have to upgrade the dratted harddrive - which means redoing this again in a few weeks.

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I'm tired of feeling tired and aching. Other than the fibromyalgia and the arthritis, I feel wonderful and I have many things I want to do and just cannot. So I end up spending time on the computer and reading. At least it gives me the opportunity to read the Church Fathers and various theological works, and I end up praying a lot more than I used to. Not being able to get to and through the Divine Liturgy is a real drag, but Father brings the Holy Gifts about once a month, and I can listen to the Liturgy on the various CDs I've found and ordered on the WEB. The Greek Church has a streaming video of the Liturgy each week, but I really, really wish there were on from one of the ROCA Churches. In English. That would be marvelous.

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Well I have 3 cases subcontracted from another company, and I need to get them done by Friday. Time to comment about medical malpractice. As a person who reviews several hundred potential medical malpractice cases each year, I am constantly astonished at the total lack of communication between medical personnel (not just doctors, but nurses, physical therapists, dentists, etc) and patients and their families.

One of the problems is that medicine is not an exact science - despite what is shown on the medically-related shows on TV! Bad things happen to nice people because of the inherent risks of certain procedures and diseases.

I recently reviewed a case involving a very aggressive type of cancer - it has one of the poorest prognoses of any of the cancers. The patient died about 6 months after diagnosis. The family wanted to sue because the patient had complained of one symptoms that might or might not have been related to the cancer 1 month prior to the diagnosis, and alleged that if the cancer had been diagnosed a month earlier the patient would not have died. Sorry! It doesn't work like that. For the vast majority of cancers (with a very, very few, rare exceptions) a month or even 2 or 3 months delay in diagnosis will not affect the ultimate outcome. It might affect longevity by about the same length of time as the delay. But the family in this case didn't understand. They were sad and angry, upset and wanted to blame someone - anyone - other than their loved one.

People, there are risks to all things in our lives. We must understand that. There are no guarantees! That is why we are admonished so much by the Church Fathers to be prepared for we know not when the day will come that we will die - and will we be prepared?

I'm not saying that there are not cases of gross negligence. There are, and I've reviewed many of them. I have no problem suggesting trial strategies for these cases. But to sue a doctor for something he had no control over? I think that is totally outside the bounds of civilized behavior.

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Someone was talking about the McDonald's coffee case the other day. This was a personal injury case that occurred in 1994. Most people don't realize that the injured party was not driving the car, and that the car was at a standstill when the accident with the coffee occurred.

McFacts abut the McDonalds Coffee Lawsuit

This website has all the true facts about the McDonald's Coffee Lawsuit. Check it out and decide for yourself if McDonald's was culpable. There are a number of other websites that address the facts of this case.

I wish that people could see the two extremes that I see - the people trying to get something for nothing, and the people who only want recompense for things that happened because of gross negligence on the part of others who should have known better. There is such a difference between the two!


Sunday, August 01, 2004

A Pearl

When a passion arises, when it is young and feeble, cut it
off, lest it stiffen and cause you a great deal of trouble.
It is one thing to pluck out a small weed and quite another
thing to uproot a great tree.

-Abba Dorotheos of Gaza

One of the members of the Orthodox Women's List posted this. What a beautiful way to express this. In our daily struggle, we need to recognize the passions and truly cut them down at the earliest stages possible.